YOU MAY HAVE TEENAGE BOYS IF....

Speaking of raising boys, you may have teenage boys living in your house if:

1. ...much of your laundry has to be prewashed - outside with the garden hose -before it can go into the washing machine.

2. ...your grocery bill is the largest item in your monthly budget - and -

3. ...you are thinking it might be more efficient to have a Kroger (or Wal-mart or Sysco) semi just deliver groceries straight to your door.

4. ...you have multiple stacks of jeans in your bedroom, waiting for a new home - the jeans that fit last month but are now too small; the ones that fit three months ago, but are now too small; and the ones that, six months ago, you didn't think the boy would ever grow into.

5. ...when you try to start the grill, you frequently find your can of lighter fluid empty because it's been used up as propellant for a home-made cannon.

6. ...it sounds like a herd of rowdy buffaloes live upstairs, due to frequent spontaneous wrestling matches.


7. ...you're seriously considering getting a cow because of the amount of milk your family consumes each week.

8. ...you have to instruct someone to fill in the foxholes they dug out in the garden before time for spring planting.

9. ...when you start your car, the radio is ON, is LOUD, and (at least out here in the sticks), is COUNTRY.

10. ...you are startled by the voices of strange men in your house, only to realize those are the voices of your children.