Sounds like the title of a really bad country song, right?
"Mom, I don't think that's a good idea." Martha sat at the bar watching me heat a plate of enchiladas in the microwave. It was late - 11:00? - too late for dinner, but I'd just gotten in from my shift at Wally World and was hungry. "I don't think you should eat that," she continued. "You're going to have weird dreams tonight."
I ate the enchiladas, read the Daily Messenger, then headed to bed just before midnight. I don't remember any weird dreams last night...only that the alarm went off much too soon this morning, waaaaaay before I was done sleeping. 6:10. Time to start a new day. Did you know that it's possible to take a shower while you're still asleep?
Enchiladas at midnight. Sleep walking. All part of the new norm.
And memory lapses. Sunday morning, I sat at the breakfast table and wrote out my little tithe check. Later, as we were heading out the door, I could not find that check any where. Not in my pocket, where I would have normally put it. Not in my Bible or my Sunday school book. Not on the table or the kitchen counter or my bedroom dresser. Not anywhere. I remembered sitting at the table, writing it out...then blank. I had absolutely no idea what I'd done next.
When we got home from church just after noon, I searched the house once more. Finally found the check - in the trash. Go figure!
Then another morning, I was making breakfast. Needed two eggs, but only had one left in the bin in the kitchen refrigerator. Well, I grabbed that one egg, then went to the laundry room frig to get another carton of eggs. Back in the kitchen, I opened the carton, placed an egg on the counter, then put the carton away. But then I couldn't find that first egg, the one I'd gotten out of the kitchen frig in the first place. Looked everywhere, growing a bit exasperated at my absent-mindedness. How do you lose an egg?!
Finally found that first egg. It was still in my hand. I'd been holding it the entire time. Duh!
Think we can make this into a Top Ten country hit?
Up before dawn, stumble to my feet
Standing in the shower still half asleep
Strong black coffee, pour myself a cup
Glow in the east says the sun's coming up
Sleep walking, sappy talking,
Rock the baby, stir the gravy.
Another cup of coffee then it's time to clock in.
Knock it out, clock out
Sleep fast and then
Buck up and do it all again
Driving home in moonlight
Enchiladas at midnight
Help me here, folks - what's the next line?
3 weeks ago