Fear is something I struggle with almost daily. Sometimes it's a relatively small, "normal" fear - Will the kids make it safely to school this morning on slick roads? Sometimes it's a weightier fear - What if we can't pay our bills and we lose the house?
Sometimes it's an intensely personal fear - What if someone I love finally sees me for who and what I really am and then they reject me? What if, at my most vulnerable, I am left standing naked and alone?
I'm still working on memorizing Romans 8 - a long process for my dusty old brain! Currently, I'm carving verses 14 and 15 into the gray matter: "For all who are led by the Spirit of God are sons of God. For you did not receive the spirit of slavery, to fall back into fear, but you have received the Spirit of adoption as sons, by whom we cry, 'Abba! Father!'"
It is comforting to be reminded that I will never, ever, ever be left standing naked and alone. The One who knows me best - all the good and the ugly - and who sees me at my most vulnerable, has promised me that I am His forever. He covers me and keeps me.
You know what? There are those whom I love dearly who have rejected me. Who have, either emotionally or quite literally, turned and walked away. It hurts to have your heart broken, and the very real pain of a broken heart makes it so easy to live in fear, to be afraid of ever being open and vulnerable again. Romans 8 is good medicine for a broken, fearful heart.
Reading through these verses again this morning, I was so greatly encouraged and strengthened as I was reminded: I am loved! I am eternally secure!
That got me to thinking: those who desire to dismiss or manipulate or malign or wound me - their sinful intentions are directed toward a weak and fearful woman, yes, but a woman who is also beloved by God.
Realizing this, it struck me this morning that I am not the one who should be afraid.
And it feels today like the world has turned upside down.
2 months ago