SHE AIN'T HEAVY - SHE'S MY MOTHER

I'm the Mom. Oftentimes, that makes me The Heavy.

You only have your Learner's Permit. No. You cannot drive to Union City unaccompanied. That would be illegal. (But M-o-o-o-o-m.....)

You have been on the PlayStation for two hours. You are rotting your brain. Turn the machine off.

Yes, you have to finish reading Module 11 in Chemistry this week. I want the practice problems at the end of the chapter turned in by Friday.

No, you cannot eat this entire watermelon...you will make yourself sick.

It hasn't rained in over a month. You may NOT fire flaming cannon balls out over the hay field.

If you want to talk about getting another dog, first you do a little research and come back with some figures on just how much it's going to cost - up front and over the long haul. Get a year's worth of "dog funds" in the bank and then we'll talk.

I don't care if you think you are warm enough. It's snowing outside. Take a coat.

Has everyone finished their chores for today?

Eat your Brussels sprouts.

We need to talk...

It's not so much that I mind being The Heavy. I really don't. It's part of the job of being a mom, and it's part of what it means to love my children. Sometimes, however, I really would like to be more fun. But maybe fun is just one of those things that you only experience sideways, kind of like peripheral vision: look too hard for it and you miss it.