HELPMEET (Groom, Part 1)

(The first of several letters to the new groom...)

Then the LORD God said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him. - Genesis 2:18, ESV

The King James Version calls the woman "an help meet" for the man. Other Scripture translations refer to this helper as "suitable," "corresponding to," and "complementary to."

A couple of things in this short verse stand out to me - 

"...the LORD God said" - I am not just reading someone's opinion in this verse, but I am encountering the very words of God.

"It is not good..." - God says that it is not good for the man to be alone. Up until this point in the creation narrative, God closes each creative act with the grand benediction, "It was good." But here, we seem to have hit a snag. God pauses in His creative action and pronounces, "It is not good..." Only after God has created the woman and presented her to her husband do we read that "God saw everything that he had made, and behold, it was very good." (Gen. 1:31)

"I will make him a helper..." - The word for "helper" used here - ezer - is the same word that God uses when He refers to Himself as the helper of his people (See Psalm 10:14, 33:20, 72:12-14, and 86:17). Take a few minutes to wrap your brain around that.

 Ezer is not a diminutive term. It does not imply that the woman is some how less than man (that is Greek philosophy, not biblical doctrine), either in value or, as an image-bearer of God, in glory. Rather, ezer refers to a strong one who comes alongside. Erase the image of June Cleaver from your brain, and consider instead Deborah (Judges 4 - 5), who rode out alongside Barak to meet and defeat Sisera.

"...a helper fit for him" - I'm going to be honest with you, young groom: there will come a time when you look at the beautiful young woman standing next to you and you think, "This is not what I signed up for! This woman is going to drive me crazy!" Maybe she has opinions that you don't agree with. Maybe you are baffled by her emotional makeup. Marriage may start feeling more like a tug-of-war than like two who are "equally yoked" and pulling together in the same direction.

Those are the times you most need to remember that God created this woman especially "fit" for/suitable for/corresponding to you. She is an extraordinary gift from God: a helper meet.

God didn't give you this woman to make your life easy-breezy and exciting (although she may do that to an extent). He didn't give you this woman to help you chase your pet rainbows (although she may help you do that, too). God gave you this woman so that together you can reflect something of His image to a fallen world. God gave you this woman to stand alongside you as you journey together toward greater holiness and a deeper knowledge of your Creator.

God created her especially "fit" for that job. He did not make her different (physically, emotionally, etc.) to exasperate you, but to teach you something about himself. It is exactly at the point of difference that you have the most to learn, and the most to gain.

"Helpmeet" - Reuben Kendall
18"x24"/acrylic on canvas
(To purchase, click HERE for info.)